Anything I say goes
No one knows where
But it goes

Anyhow, this is not about what I say, but about those wonderful people we bump into every now and then who love to disburse advice, however unwarranted or unwelcome.

Today I had the good fortune of participating in The Great Indian Tamasha a.k.a. a family wedding.

Family weddings are a place where all the grand dames of the family, and God knows with our extended family system we have aunts and grannies pouring out of every nook and cranny, converge to wage subtle competitions and embark upon not so subtle treasure hunts.
The wedding games…

Of all the challenges, the two most popular ones are who can disburse the greatest wisdom and who is the better critic.
Every task needs to be done in a certain way for fear of shaking the very foundation upon which our culture stands, and every single task that is done could certainly have been done better had we only adhered to the judicious advises of our grand dames. Wisdom here, are low hanging apples just waiting to be plucked. Learn how to raise your children like the fabulous Aunty X. Learn to be the perfect housekeeper like the magical Aunty Y. Learn how to control your husband like the shrewd Aunty Z. Wait – No! Aunty Z is a tramp cautions Aunty XY. In our culture a woman should not…blah…blah…
The second critiques challenge is very dear to the guardians of our value system. Revealing clothes? Black star. Nontraditional clothes or coloured hair? Black star. Behaving in a manner unbecoming of a girl from a good family? Black star. Chortling with a member of the opposite sex? Two black stars. In their days they would have never dared…blah…blah…

But by far the most important event is the treasure hunt, accompanied by background score of matchmaker matchmaker make me a match… find me a guy… catch me a catch…, imagined of course.
The database of available bachelors and bachelorettes is quickly updated, cross references with family trees, graded based on education and social status, and then potential connections are determined. This exercise is one of the fundamental pillars upon which the entire institution of the arranged marriage system rests.

Now let me not paint too dreary a picture. It’s not like weddings are a conclave of hags brewing their magic potions and pronouncing ominous predictions. It is one of those few occasions where we all put our personal commitments aside and commit instead to our family and friends. We get to know who is where, why and how. We get to let down our hair and have fun, and obviously a large part of the fun is to laugh at the cost of the grand dames.

Anybody will tell you – After all, we are on our way to become them.


Written for the Stream of Consciousness Saturday prompt “Any”

3 thoughts on “Everybody wants to rule the world

  1. Wow! What a revealing look into the ‘Grand Dames’ and how across religions and societies, these ladies encourage the best while exuding the worst. Pitting woman against woman, challenging us to be more like others and less like ourselves – yet we find there are very few who do not make it to that esteemed age and not pass on wisdom in the form of slights. Wonderful stream of consciousness ❤


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